Sometimes I mourn the life we left behind. I feel sad that my kids will not know the way the woods smell in the morning, or how the peacocks sound at sunset. I feel sad that they won’t experience a real July 4th or know the feeling excitement at seeing a home run in a big baseball stadium. High school football games, and proms……….Homecoming and Sadie Hawkins dances………….Parades and Christmas………….. I miss home.
I don’t regret that we are here, but I do feel like I have taken something away from my children. I feel like I have taken some of their heritage away from them. I don’t know. I am so happy that we were given the opportunity to live here in the UAE and I wouldn’t change it right now, but I am still sad. I grew up seeing the rolling hills of West Texas and smelling the rain on a stormy Spring night watching the weather reports with excitement as the tornadoes rolled across the planes, and while that is sometimes scary, it is still part of who I am. It is part of my life that I want my children to know about. I am a southern gal who went cow tippin in the balmy summer evenings and sat around bon fires with my friends whispering about the cute boy on the other side of the fire. I was in band and belonged to the newspaper club and lived for the day I turned 16 so I could drive. My kids won’t have any of that here. What they will have instead is knowledge of the world and of a different culture. That is great, don’t get me wrong. I am still mourning what I took away from them though.
Does any of this make sense? Am I the only parent that feels this way? Am I the only crazy person who gets depressed about this sort of thing?